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STOP! THINK! 4 Things You Need To Ask Before You Commit to That Relationship


There’s this guy. We are just friends.

He likes me. I like him. Nothing is happening yet.

Stop! Now is the time to T.H.I.N.K.

When two people are emotionally attached, it becomes difficult to see things objectively.

When emotions are running high, it’s more difficult to focus on the things that matter to you.

That’s why the time to think is Now, not later.

What should you think about?

  • Do we serve the same God? Is he a believer as I am? Is he on the same page with me when it comes to my faith? This should be the first and most important consideration any single person should have. This is because if you are a true child of God, you will only desire to be in a relationship that is based solely on God’s word and principles. There’s no way you can have that kind of relationship with an unbeliever. Someone once said, “if you marry an unbeliever, the devil automatically becomes your father-in-law”.

“Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness?” – 2 Corinthians 6:14


  • Do we share the same values? Even if someone is a true child of God, it does not mean that you’ll share the same values with such a person. The things that matter the most to you may just be a point of indifference for such a person. Now is the time to ask the right questions about what is really important to this person. Both of you must be on the same page on the things that are most important to you. If this area is not addressed, it will become a point of conflict later in the relationship.

“Can two walk together, unless they be agreed?” – Amos 3:3


  • Is Christ Number One in both our lives? When Jesus is the centre of your lives, then He can truly be the centre of your relationship. When someone is truly sold out to God, and is willing to please God in everything, you can be sure that such a man will not mistreat you. His desire will be only towards doing you good always.

“Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen.” – I John 4:20

true talk

  • Are we both ready to have a relationship free from sin? Recognizing the fact that your relationship should be holy before God is an important factor for both of you. If one of you is still not convinced that your relationship will be devoid of lust, sex, and sin, then you need to iron that matter out before you fully commit to each other.

Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.” – 1 Corinthians 6:18-20


Daughter of God, Marriage is a lifelong commitment.

Taking time to Stop and Think is not a waste of time – it can spare you unnecessary heart aches.

“Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.” – Ecclesiastes 4:9

S.T.O.P. and T.H.I.N.K.

Oluseye Ashiru

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“Glow, please don’t say that. I really am very sorry for all the pain I caused you. I really tried to get in touch with you after my Masters program, but by the time I could get in touch, I was told you were already planning your wedding. I did not want to be an intruder, so I just let you be.”
“I still love you Glow.”
“You can’t love me. What about your wife?”
“I just got married to her because you were already married. It’s you I love and not her”.
“Please take me back to my office. I can’t do this”


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